As your parents grow older, you may begin to notice small changes in their memory, behaviour, or thinking patterns. Maybe your mother forgets where she placed her phone, or your father repeats a story without realising it. These moments might make you pause and wonder, is this just normal ageing, or could it be something more serious, like dementia?
Understanding the difference between the two is one of the most valuable ways you can support your parents as they age. It not only eases your concerns but also helps in ensuring timely help if needed.
Normal Ageing: What to Expect
Ageing naturally affects memory and processing speed. Everyone forgets things occasionally, even you do. So, if your parent sometimes:
- Misplaces items but finds them later,
- Takes a little longer to recall a name,
- Occasionally forgets the day of the week but realises soon after,
- Struggles for a word but eventually remembers it,
This is usually part of normal ageing. These changes don’t disrupt daily life in a major way, and your parent remains independent and able to make decisions, keep appointments, and manage their routine.
Dementia: When It’s More Than Just Forgetfulness
Dementia, unlike normal ageing, involves a progressive decline in brain function. It can affect memory, thinking, language, and even personality. Alzheimer’s disease is the most common form, but all types of dementia can significantly impact daily life.
Here’s how it might show up:
- Your parent forgets recent events or important dates and doesn’t recall them later.
- They start getting lost in familiar places.
- They find it hard to follow conversations or instructions.
- You notice them putting items in strange places, like keeping car keys in the fridge.
- Their judgment seems off, they fall for scams, or dress inappropriately for the weather.
- There’s a noticeable change in mood, from calm to suspicious or withdrawn.
If you see these signs repeatedly, it’s important not to dismiss them as “just old age.”
Spotting the Differences: A Quick Guide
Normal Ageing |
Possible Dementia |
| Occasionally forgetting names | Forgetting close family names or familiar faces |
| Losing things occasionally | Misplacing items in strange places and being unable to retrace steps |
| Sometimes forgetting the day | Losing track of time, seasons, or place |
| Needing a reminder | Repeating the same questions or stories often |
| Mood changes due to tiredness | Personality changes, confusion, or suspicion |
Why Early Detection Matters
As a concerned caregiver, your involvement can make a huge difference. Many people delay getting help, thinking forgetfulness is just part of ageing. But identifying dementia early has real benefits:
- Better treatment options to slow down progression.
- Planning for finances, care, and safety.
- Involving your parent in decisions while they still can.
- Reducing your anxiety by knowing what’s happening and how to manage it.
Sometimes, symptoms that look like dementia may be due to other treatable issues, like vitamin deficiencies, thyroid problems, medication side effects, or even stress. Only a proper check-up can confirm the cause.
What You Can Do
If you’re worried about your parent, here are practical steps you can take:
- Have a gentle conversation about what you’ve noticed. Use examples, speak with love, and avoid blame.
- Encourage a medical evaluation. Start with the family doctor, who can guide you to a neurologist or memory clinic if needed.
- Join them for the check-up. You can provide context and help recall details they might forget.
- Observe patterns; keep a journal of changes you notice. This helps doctors make an accurate diagnosis.
- Stay involved and supportive. Even if the diagnosis is mild cognitive impairment or dementia, your role as a companion and guide becomes more important than ever.
Offering Everyday Support
If your parent is diagnosed with dementia, your understanding and patience will be key. Here’s how you can support them in daily life:
- Create routines to reduce confusion.
- Label drawers and rooms to help with orientation.
- Use reminders: sticky notes, phone alarms, pill organisers.
- Keep things simple, clear instructions, and familiar surroundings.
- Watch for stress triggers and provide reassurance.
You don’t have to do it all alone. Connect with support groups or professional eldercare services. Organisations like ARDSI (Alzheimer’s and Related Disorders Society of India) offer excellent resources for families.
In Closing
Watching your parent grow older can be a beautiful but sometimes challenging journey. Occasional forgetfulness is natural, but when changes seem deeper or more concerning, trust your instincts. The earlier you act, the more you can do to help your parent live with dignity, safety, and joy.
Your support, awareness, and care could make all the difference.
